Despite the misgivings of my friends, who labelled it variously the "Great Satan" and the "United Snakes of America", I made my way forth across the ditch to the United States of America in June/July 2007. I was there for a total of 33 days, covering both the West and East Coasts.

My reason for going was essentially to visit some friends (mostly former student's of mine) who had been asking me to come and visit. So, after consuming a vast quantity of alcohol one night, I purchased a round-trip ticket to Los Angeles with Air New Zealand. I could ill-afford it, but waking up to find I had done so, I worked like an animal to pay for the trip.

The trip essentially grew around where I wanted to visit and where my friends were living. Some areas I wanted to see had to be left off for time and logistical reasons. Others were included on recommendations from my now housemate Jake, who had visited seppo-land in 2005/6.

Generally speaking, I had a good time. Most people spoke English, the food was recognisable and menu's readable, and a disappointing lack of scams. I was also distraught by the lack of haggling. The trip was punctuated by nearly habitual problems with transport (delayed trains, United Airlines computers crashing, Delta simply cancelling my flight, and of course the joys that come with travelling on Greyhound). The weather stayed fine and HOT most of the time, to a point where Washington DC was unbearably hot and humid.

Travelling within the State's proved no major hassle, save for some run-ins with various Law Enforcement agencies. More on that in the relevant areas.

This section deals with California, whereupon I visited Los Angeles and San Francisco. Keep an eye out for the sections on Chicago, Boston, New York, Pennsylvania, Washington DC and Las Vegas.

Despite 6 out of 7 members of my family travelling to the USA and passing through LAX, I am the only one who has actually spent time in LA. They say that if America was tipped on it's side, all the loose bits would end up in LA. I'd believe that. It truly was an odd collection of mismatched parts.

My initial reaction upon leaving LA was that it was, to be frank, a hole. Having time to reflect upon that...no, it's still a hole. But a hole with it's own certain charm.

Firstly, Hollywood, where I stayed. It truly is a "tale of two cities". Hollywood Blvd, famous for its stars on the pavement can be divided according to Highland avenue. On one side is the glitzy end, with the high-end shops, glamour, and the daytime Emmy awards (which I ran in to by accident). On the other: tattoo parlours, stodgy convenience stores and a good number of beggars.

Downtown LA, though not without it's charms was essentially like any other CBD you care to mention. Low-to-medium sky scrapers, a scattering of shops and so forth. Still, the view from City Hall was nice, and free!

Before you think that all im going to do is bag LA, I did quite enjoy Santa Monica and Venice. The Santa Monica pier was quite good, even for a tourist trap. The rather uninspiring Mexican food I had turned out to be the only Mexican I ate in the entire trip. Yet there was something about Santa Monica that just came across as downright pleasant.

Walking down to Venice along the beach, I was able to take my sandals off and dip my feet, to say I've been in both sides of the Pacific ocean. There were a number of lifeguard's on duty, but David Hasselhoff was not to be seen. Nor were they doing their "running down the beach in Slo-Mo" practice, which was a drag.

Venice itself was cool, with everyone fairly laid back and a bit kooky. Bum's with signs saying "Need money for beer and weed" was surreal. The rollerblading Sikh Minstrel had his moments, as did the Jamaican guys who did a human pyramid or two. Nonetheless, the shopping was simply henna tattoo's, cruddy t-shirts and assorted beachware. Some of the hawker's did offer a few kooky handicrafts, but nothing I could take home without breaking.

I had intended on heading down to Long Beach on my last day in LA, but the trains were cancelled due to trackworks, which meant changing to a bus in Compton. I didn't really fancy doing that, unsurprisingly.

And so, I made my way forth to San Francisco.

San Francisco was a welcome relief after LA. I could breathe the air, for a start, and it wasn't anywhere near as hot and humid. Typical of SF weather apparently.

I started my tour of SF with a visit and a walk through Chinatown, which had a very "Singapore" feel to it. Clean and orderly, but with a distinctive Asian flair. I ate lunch here, which turned out to be typicaly "Western" Chinese food, as opposed to "traditional" chinese food. In other words, it was more settling for my stomach, which was having issues adapting.

Heading out of Chinatown and in to the Italian quarter, I stumbled across a myriad of stalls and concert's in honour of Father's day. A short walk up a steep hill (a theme in San Francisco) took me to Coit Tower, where fine views were had across the downtown, bay and northern areas. Returning back down the hill, I meandered through the markets in the Italian district before walking back to my hostel by way of Union Square. I covered a lot of ground that day, all by foot.

The next day, in the company of two Aussie girls I'd met in LA (who hail from Melbourne as well), we headed out to Postcard row, then over to the Golden Gate to walk across. AS you can see from the photos, the bridge was well and truly fogged in, but the walk across was still fun in a strange kind of way. Side note, I got horribly windburnt from the biting wind. Be more careful next time!

We then made our way to the sunny Fisherman's wharf district and poked around happily for the rest of the afternoon. Then, tackling yet another steep hill, we made it to the top of Lombard street to take photos of "the world's most crooked street". What a sight it was too...very strange.

My final day in San Francisco was spent out at Alctraz Island in the morning, followed by a harbour cruise in the afternoon. Alcatraz was one of my main reasons for going to SF, and it didn't disappoint. Though smaller than I expected, I got there early to avoid the crowds and the free audio tour was quite thorough without being boring. I could've stayed for a ranger talk on the early history of Alcatraz, but I had already got my tickets for my harbour cruise (damn my retentive nature).

The cruise itelf was good. Again, an audio recording was provided on a headset, and the sun managed to come out for most of the cruise. The wind made life a little less pleasant though. Even so, it was quite an enjoyable trip around the harbour.

Finally, after another wander around Fisherman's wharf, a mint sundae at Ghiradelli square, and a beer at some tavern advertising 88 beers, I hopped on a cable car and headed back to Union Square and up Post St to my hostel.

I returned to LA for a final day on my last leg before flying home. I ventured back to Venice for a lazy day by the sea, achieving very little other than a nifty players hat and a little more sunburn.

All over, I liked California. I didn't see Arnie, and I can certainly see why it's such a popular part of the state's to visit!