Actually, I spent a week in a small town just outside Allentown, travelling the country side, visiting out of the way places, and, dare I say it, experiencing the "real" America (whatever that may be).

My host for the week was Jessie (Hi Jessie!), a former student of mine, and we spent the week touring around Pennsyvlania's south and east. Thought the section of PA I was in didn't have any 'big name' tourist attractions (except for Philly), I had an absolute blast!

The first order of business was to visit a town called Jim Thorpe (named for a Native American athelete who competed at the 1912 Stockholm Olympics), which is known as the "Switzerland of America". Having been to the "Switzerland of Europe", I can see the comparison. It did have a rather European feel to it, and was quite hilly. Im sure with a scattering of snow the illusion would be complete. In Jim Thorpe we toured the mansion of Asa Packer, a self made millionaire who lived in the town when it was called "Mauch Chunk" and made his money in Railways.

Naturally, no trip to PA can be complete without a visit to Philadelphia, indeed a city that makes up part of the "East Coast Triumvirate" comprising of New York, Philly and Washington DC. Arriving by regional train, we headed first to the Visitors Centre to score tickets to Independence Hall. Despite arriving just after 10:30am, the earliest we could get tickets for was 3:30pm. Never underestimate the popularity of the seat of American democracy in the days leading up to July 4th!

Undeterred, we took to the sights of Philly with gusto, visiting the Liberty Bell, more of Independence Park, and the waterfront. We came across a bunch of people lining up for something...heaps of people. Figuring it was going to be good, I joined the line. I was disappointed to learn it was people lining up to get Passports. Having already got 2 passports, and with no real need for a third, I passed up my place in the line. That, and Im not an American citizen.

After hitting the waterfront district, we jumped on the Philly Phlash, a trolley style bus that's a bargain at $4 for a day ticket. We just south of the City Hall, and walked back up through Love Park. Following this, we jumped on another trolley and headed out to the Museum of Art. I've got no interest in Art, modern or otherwise. I really only wanted to see the Rocky steps and the Rocky statue. I was not disappointed. I did, however, resist the urge to run up the steps and jump around.

Later, we visited Independence Hall, and I was left in the strange position of not being able to understand the guide's English! It wasn't so much the accent, it was the speed at which he talked. And they say us Aussies talk quickly...

A wise man said, "When in Rome, do as the Romans". Transposing this to Philadelphia, I had to have a legendary Philly Cheesesteak. And so, we hit the mean streets of South Philly in search of Pat's and Geno's, rival purveyor's of Cheesesteaks, operating opposite one another. We ate at Pat's, for no real reason other than they had a free table. All the goodness of cheese and steak, in the convenience of a bread roll.

The next day we trooped out to Centralia, a town that was abandonded due to a fire in an underground coal seam that causes sudden ground subsidence, poisonous gases and other such things. To me, a Connoisseur of drains, abandoned buildings and former Soviet military installations, Centralia was just what the Doctor ordered. To my good hosts, it was inexplicably strange that I would want to go and see the town.

Yet, it did not fail to meet expectations. After a quick driving tour, we parked and I explored on my own, with Jessie refusing point blank to join me: "Don't fall in to any holes, and don't get in any trouble!". Who, me?

Well, I didn't fall down any holes. I wandered the township taking photos with both my film and digital camera. I spotted an Orthodox Church on a hill, but sadly couldn't get to it. I found a couple of remaining houses, some foundations, a set of steps going no-where and several points where smoke was eminating from under the ground. I also located 2 very well kept cemeteries, one Russian Orthodox, one general Christian. And, I also found an air quality reader.

I knew from internet research that there was a section route 61 that had been abandoned due to unstable conditions. I had to find it, so I walked up the new route 61 towards where I thought it would be. People driving past me were a little surprised. But not as surprised as the Pennsylvania State policeman who stopped me.

After a short conversation whereby I convinced him that I really was just a loopy tourist with peculiar tastes, and an inspection of my drivers license (which he found amusing), he let me on my way, but not without a warning about falling in a hole.

I found the highway. Walked down it a distance until ever increasing graffiti on the road suggested I go the other way. I've learnt something in Urban Exploration: When graffiti tells you to turn back; do it!

To round out the day of exploration, we then went to Crystal Cave near Kutztown. A short limestone cave with a few formations, it made for an interesting stop over, with quite nice scenery surrounding it. We had intended to stop at the Kutztown German festival, but at $15 per head? Nein, Danke!

That evening, I sat in the forecourt of a servo to watch fireworks for independence day. A pleasant evening, lots of bangs and explosions. My kind of time.

The next day was July 4 (referred to as J4. Can I refer to Australia Day as J26 from now on?). I spent the morning on a computer catching up on a lot of work I hadn't done. There is no rest for the wicked, and the Monash juggernaut continues whether im there or not. That afternoon we enjoyed an Independence Day feast, before settling to watch the fireworks in Washington on TV. The fireworks where we were had been washed out due to torrential rain, and a tornado warning. I just had to message home about the Tornado Warning! Oddly (or perhaps not), no-one seemed too concerned. Bah, stupid family of mine.

The following morning I was asked to give a guest lecture on the merits of being an Australian in the modern world. Or, to put it more accurately, I was roped in to speaking to some kids about Australia. I turned the "Aussie factor" up a notch, and told them about life in Aus, followed by some Q&A time. The most probing question: "Do you have McDonalds?". The strangest question: "What do you do with dead people?". It was good fun though, I don't begrudge doing it in the least. Always a good ambassador for my country!

Following this, I went to the Yuengling brewery. I told my mother that kids would drive me to the drink; in a surprising twist it turns out I was right...

Truthfully, I can't pass up a brewery tour. I've been on brewery tours in a number of cities and towns, but I've never been on the Carlton and United tour in Melbourne. Anyway, the FREE tour concluded with 2 FREE samples! It's all good in my book (or at least, my article).

My final day in PA was to be spent in the Dutch country, in Lancaster county. After a bit of uncharacteristic map-reading incompetence on my part, we made it to "the Amish Experience" just past the amusingly named township of "Intercourse".

The "Amish Experience" comprised of a movie called 'Jacob's Choice' complete with special effects in the cinema itself (Now showing in Amish-a-rama in selected theatres!), and a tour of an Amish house that had been museum-ised. Now, given my knowledge of the Amish is limited to the Harrison Ford film "Witness" (and a Weird Al song) it was somewhat eye-opening. Yeah, they still drive buggies and shun modern things, but it's a little more in-depth than that. Go to Lancaster and find out for yourself the salient details!

After experiencing the Amish, we headed out to Annville and Lebanon Valley College, home university of my host and a number of other former students. Picking one up at the college, we went to Hershey's Chocolate world to do the "tour" of the "factory". It was...surreal, to say the least. Weeks later, Im still troubled by singing cows.

Finally, I met with my former students for dinner, where we ate, drank and were generally merry.

But all good things come to an end, and with a final drink at the bar opposite where I was staying, I bade farewell to PA and to my hosts. The next day I took the train from Philly to DC and continued on with my American extravaganza.